Tribute To My Lover

August 5th, 2009

Been sweatin’ to the boom box

At the body boutique

My baby likes his lady lean and sleek

So I’m  pumpin’  iron

Goin’  for the burn

Got a killer body in return

With the lights on

With the lights on

Now I do it with the lights on

Like a video queen, lookin’  sweet sixteen

Makin’  love… makin’  love

With the lights on

Nothin’ beats paradin’ in the buff

Showin’  it all,  struttin’ my stuff

Now my muscles are firm

My desire’s high

I know the way to please my guy

With the lights on

by Felicia Reymont

Horace Linsley

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Happy Birthday Nanny

August 4th, 2009

I know it’s your birthday

So I want to say

I hope you have fun

On you special day


In a couple of weeks

We’ll spend it together

But I guess we won’t have

The same kind of weather


Maybe we’ll play Barbies

And change all their clothes

We’ll dress them up pretty

From their hair to their toes


We could play Play Doh

As long as it’s new

Which it usually is

Thanks to you


I miss you nanny

‘Cause you’re so much fun

Of  all the grandmas there  are

You’re the  BEST  ONE

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Birthday Toast

August 2nd, 2009

Dear Diane

Congratulations

On your special day

You don’t look three score and ten

No way

Seeing you again

Was a special treat

We need many more

Happy reasons to meet

Enjoying fine ice cream

We formed a bond

We’ll treasure the memory

Of  St. Armand

Keep up with your beading

May it bring you success

Here’s to your health

And happiness

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Birthday Toast

August 2nd, 2009

Dear Diane

Congratulations on your special day

You don’t look three score and ten, no way

Seeing you again was a special treat

We need many more happy reasons to meet

Enjoying fine ice cream we formed a bond

We’ll treasure the memory of St. Armand

Keep up with your beading, may it bring you success!

Here’s to your health and happiness

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Wedding Toast

July 31st, 2009

I actually fainted while giving a wedding toast.  When I came

to I was sprawled out on the carpet, the bridal party anxiously

hovering over me.  I was beyond embarrassed.


Yes,  I was suffering a case of the jitters when I stood up to give

my well rehearsed toast.  In fact I’d been nervous about this day ever

since I’d agreed to be the maid of honor for my best friend.  After

all, getting up and saying a few words was part of the gig.  But

pass out?  That was a bit extreme,to say the least.

It turns out that one of the greatest fears we humans have is

public speaking.  But why did I have to be so darned nervous

about giving a wedding toast for someone I’ve been close to all

my life?


I knew most of the guests.  In fact the five girls who were

the bridesmaids and I all grew up together.

I knew my girlfriend’s parents.  I knew her brothers.  Even her

aunts and uncles were like aunts and uncles to me, too.  The

whole family treated me like one of their own.   They joked about

how I would catch the bouquet and be the next one in our crowd

to get married.  They loved to tease about how I would meet my

prince charming and make his life a sorry mess.


The point is, I should have been pretty relaxed about giving a


wedding toast in front of people who cared about me  They


always rooted for me and would never have been judgmental.

But, if the truty be told,  I was a wreck about it from the moment I

was asked to speak.  During the weeks that led up to the big event

I wrote and re-wrote what I wanted to say.  Yet I was never quite

satisfied.  I’m not that bad a writer, but being clever, witty and

sentimental all rolled into one  turns out not to be so easy.  I

wanted my wedding toast to bring down the house.  I yearned to

give my girlfriend the send-off she so deserved.  Turns out that’s a

pretty tall order.

I rehearsed my little speech over and over in my mind until I knew

it backwards and forwards.  But when my big moment came, I still

can’t believe I keeled over.

After trying  a thousand times to analize the most embarrassing

moment in my life, I’ve had a lightbulb moment.  I had been


kidding myself all along.  I knew my wedding toast wasn’t that

entertaining.  The words I wrote hadn’t really captured what my

best friend meant to me.  When I tried writing about her many

attributes and my good wishes for her and her new husband it just

didn’t come across.   I managed to take all the life out of it . It was

dull and boring as could be.  And I’m not being hard on myself,

either.


Writing a great wedding toast takes talent.  Certainly more


than what I had.  Deep down I knew my speech wasn’t going to be

a winner and that’s why I fainted.

Had I had my head on straight I would have searched the internet

for a ghostwriter.  I had no idea you could hire hire someone  do it

for you.  In fact I didn’t even know if such a service existed.  But

now that I’ve done some research I can assure you that they do.

Believe me, next time I’m asked to make a wedding toast I will

hire  www.rhymeshop.com to make me shine.

I want to be the belle of the ball.  The words that come out of my

mouth will be pearls; so extraordinary and perfect for the occasion

that I will never feel nervous about making a toast again.

Tribute To Teacher

July 29th, 2009

Congratulations, teacher

Thank you so much for the book

I’m very proud and honored

To see you used my hook

It’s been a while since last we spoke

So here is all the news

You haven’t seen me lately

Due to the recession blues

Discretionary income

Has dwindled quite a bit

But I keep writing all the time

Still hoping for a hit

So far there are no nibbles

Don’t know where to put the blame

My search for good collaborators

Seems to be in vain

And then without a warning

All my hair was falling out

Embarrassing and frightening

And wierd without a doubt

The medical profession

Was no help at all

But I stumbled on a cure myself

And I can smile again

I’ved missed your special classes

And your wonderful critiques

As things calm down I’m hoping

To be back one of these weeks

I tell the world about you

And your great ability

Your knowledge and insightfulness

Brought out the best in me

Good luck with the fantastic book

I love my bit of fame

Imagine what a thrill it was

To recognize my name

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July 28th, 2009

Sixty years ago today

Way back when I was three

A baby girl was being born

Who’d mean the world to me

We didn’t meet ’til we were grown

And commuting to the city

I’d never seen such sparkly eyes

She was so petite and pretty

We fell in love and tied the knot

How lucky could I get?

She was smart and sweet and caring

All of ninety-nine pounds soaking wet

And so two kids from Yonkers

Worked and saved to buy a house

In Pelham we started a family

Me and my tiny spouse

Tanya gained eleven pounds

With our children, Mary and Ken

And once they were born she went right back

To ninety-nine pounds again

But years commuting back and forth

Became a real drag

After one too many snowstorms

We Jonses packed a bag

Off we moved to California

To frolic in the sun

We made the right decision

And life was much more fun

Every day was easier

No hats or coats or boots

We walked around in shorts and tee shirts

And I gave away my suits

Tanya’s talents really blossomed

In the balmy air

She made our home a castle

With her decorating flair

She kept us all well nourished

Because she’s an awesome cook

She could easily have a cooking show

Or publish a recipe book

Tanya’s quite the “handyman”

There’s nothing she can’t fix

She even made the surround sound work

With her little bag of tricks

Our house is always perfect

Tanya keeps the place pristine

The Queen could drop in unannounced

Thanks to Mrs. Clean

There is no better wife or mom

Or daughter, anywhere

And the way she loves our grandkids

Is just beyond compare

Ben and Angelina

Are the greatest kids on earth

They’re grandma Tanya’s pride and joy

She bonded with them at birth

Here’s to good health and happiness

And cruises on the sea

To our ninety-nine pound tiger

The heart of our family

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Wedding Toast

July 27th, 2009

The planet’s in financial meltdown
A pandemic’s galloping on
Woolworth closed its doors
And now the King of Pop is gone

The crooked politicians
What a bunch of greedy hounds
Busy buying duck homes
With our hard-earned pounds

These are strange times but nothing
Will rain on our parade
Luckily we’re cockeyed optimists
So we’ve got it made

We’re in this ’til forever
We love each other loads
So Daniel and I are getting hitched
In case the world implodes

Not since John and Yoko
Has there been a more formidable pair
We’ve got the spark; we’ll make our mark
With laughter, style and flair

My hubby’s a top notch film-maker
Generous, kind and wise
With a classy Bristolian accent
And sparkling brown eyes

Now Mr. & Mrs. Jones we’ll be
A madcap husband and wife
Always there for one another
Making the most of life

Darlings we’re so greatful
You’ve stuck with us all the way
Be assured this isn’t just another
Crazy escapade

A heartfelt thanks to our fabulous folks
Of whom we’re incredibly proud
Let’s raise a glass in celebration
You’re an awesome crowd

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Thank You Tribute To My Doctor

July 26th, 2009

When I got my diagnosis

I barely could cope

But with you as my doctor

I slowly gained hope


You have all the knowledge

This illness demands

I’m lucky to be

In your capable hands


You expertly chose

What to give me and when

But I never would want

To go through it again


What a nightmare it’s been

For a woman alone

And each time I’ve called you

You answered the phone


Not once have you rushed me

You wait patiently

You couldn’t treat me better

If I was royalty


You have such compassion

More than your share

There’s not an M.D.

Like you anywhere


I’m not a spring chicken

I’ve know doctors galore

But there’s not another

Who gives his patients more


What brilliance it takes

To get where you’ve gotten

Yet you have such humility

You aren’t spoiled rotten


Thank you sounds trite

But what more can I say

You’re my hero and I wish you

The best, come what may

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Happy Birthday Toast To Millie

July 24th, 2009

Dear Millie,

We’re gathered here to honor Millie

On her special day

She means the world to each of us

And there’s a bit we’d like to say

She’s our very favorite Aunt

We bonded from the start

The warmest, most fun-loving friend

With a great big generous heart

There’s nobody quite like her

She’s a sport beyond compare

She loves to be where the action is

And she’ll travel anywhere

A gathering at Millie’s house

Is a very special treat

She’s the hostess with the mostest

Serving yummy things to eat

Her place is always spotless

You could eat right off the floor

She makes you feel like royalty

From the moment you walk through the door

We’ve never heard her fret

About the hand that she was dealt

She just picked up the pieces

And went out to earn the gelt

Her girls are her priority

Always number one

Jan and Betty both reflect

The awesome job she’s done

Along the way with her good looks

She’s turned a lot of heads

But Millie liked her freedom

And decided not to wed

Although just like the rest of us

She came from Adam’s rib

There’s just no doubt about it

Millie started women’s lib

Still she ached to be a grandma

And it happened kind of late

But there’s no other kid like Ian

He was worth the wait

Now Millie is our matriarch

Though she doesn’t look her age

Always groomed impeccably

Like she stepped off a fashion page

What a mentor she has been

So strong and self-reliant

No wonder Millie is the woman

Whom we most admire

We wish you all the very best

May your cares be left behind

Let’s gather here again next year

With health and peace of mind


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